Tuesday, January 22, 2008

Five Ways To Feign Being Cultured

1) Talk about that incredible Ethiopian restaurant you ate at last night. The wat was to die for.

2) Recount your last trip to Italy (even if you've never been.) Find out the best places to stay on Fodors.com and talk about your stay at The d'Inghilterra. Throw in a few Italian sayings now and then. "Niente di nuovo sotto il sole!" Then follow up with: "That means, there's nothing new under the sun. The Italians in the little villa I stayed in love that saying."

3) Say you play squash, but if anyone asks you for a game say you injured yourself in the British Open. Still, you don't regret that day because you made it to the semi-finals.

4) Your prep school was so prestigious, you're sure they haven't heard of it.

5) Subscribe to a few contemporary art blogs and tell everyone about up-and-coming artists. You own their paintings and they're going to be worth millions.

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